Philadelphia Phillies' Mascot

Seriously, wtf is this:

Does that really count as a mascot? I think that if your mascot is simply an assortment of shapes and colors, it shouldn't really count. I understand that you Philadelphians might think that as long as you throw a uniform on something and cleverly use alliteration to name it (Phillie Phanatic), it can count as a mascot. But that's not how the world works.

In order for a mascot to be motivational and intimidating to any extent, it shouldn't be a nightmare Muppet from Hell with somewhat anthropomorphic characteristics.

I literally laughed aloud when I read the Wikipedia's description of the monster:

"He is a fat, furry, green creature that somewhat resembles a bird from the rear view with a cylindrical beak containing a tongue that sticks out and is one of the most popular and most easily recognized mascots in all of sports."

So.. in the dire late innings of baseball games in Philadelphia, when almost all hope is lost and the fans have all but given up, who do they turn to? A fat green creature that somewhat resembles a bird. Go team!

You know, the more I think of it, the more ingenious having a nightmarish character as your mascot seems to be. I mean, what better way to distract your opponent than by having them see this before going to bat:

Absolutely. Horrifying.