I have decided that anyone who carries around a toothpick in their mouth at all times is a complete douche.My reasoning for this is, that they (douches) necessitate something hard being in their mouth at all times.
Instead of pushing the sexual innuendo here, I'm instead going to state that I think each and every one of you twerps (yes, I called you twerps), who enjoy chewing on toothpicks are actually trying to cover up your stupidity with overzealous body language.
You know how I can tell? Because every time you're discussing something, you decide, "Hmmm... I'm going to take this toothpick out of my mouth and point it at the person I'm talking to in order to gesture that I actually have a clue as to what I'm talking about."
But you don't have a clue of what you're talking about. You never do. That's why you chew toothpicks.
Plus you wish you had a cigarette in your mouth, because that's what people who smoke cigarettes do.
My logic is undeniable.
Douche.
Douche.
1 comment:
The author of this post is a douchebag...because I decided so. He'd rather people not kick their habit of smoking with the aid of a toothpick, and he'd rather them continue to smoke and die of lung cancer. My logic is undeniable, you douche.
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