Remember when we were kids and we got trophies for participating in sports? I miss that stuff. I'm really starting to think it's time we brought back that monotonous rewarding system.
I mean, think of it. The economy's down, everybody's bummed, and nobody is getting any free trophies.
Screw Obama's stimulus package plan to help save the economy. You know what Obama? I've got your stimulus package right here.
You know what's a way better idea to save the economy than helping to create proper infrastructure that is able to support and adapt to the global economic imbalances we're seeing today?Trophies. Yeah, trophies.
If this whole "recession" problem has so much to do with individuals not spending money, then we should give them an incentive to do so. If we had a rewarding system in place for people who go out to stores and buy things, I guarantee you we'd fix this economy by tomorrow by about 5 o'clock (p.m., not a.m. - I'm not THAT crazy).
It wouldn't work, you say, because if everyone got a trophy, there would be no real incentive? Well, I'll show you, I say. Get this: not everybody will get the same sized trophy. Nuh uh.
The size of trophy you will receive will be directly proportional to the size of the "thing" you buy. For instance, the biggest trophies will be designated for people buying vehicles (and up). Smaller trophies will be designated towards things as small as a pack of spaghetti. We will certainly have pocket-sized trophies for minuscule objects.
So anyway, yeah. That's my plan to save the economy. Basically, my logic is infallible and you should all bend to my every whim.
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