Giving 110%

You know what, you can go on and keep giving 110% on whatever rudimentary thing you're doing. You know why I'm so willing to allow you to do so? Because it doesn't make any damn sense to give 110%

I constantly hear people telling their 5 year old kids to go out and give their all when doing things like hitting a baseball off a stationary tee. To give their all, parents will say, a necessitated 110% must be given.

Little do they know, the human body is only able to give 100%, thereby following the laws of mathematics, statistics, and physics.

Or so I thought before writing this article.

What if it is possible to give more than 100%? What would you have to do to do so? If you're able to break the laws of nature, does it then thereby follow that you have found a means of hacking life?

If you can hack life, what else can you do? Can you fly? If you're able to hack life, I'm sure you're able to do cooler things than just hit a baseball off a tee. Like fly.

This subject deserves a lot more analysis on my behalf, and I promise to begin going about my studies in the following months and years. I'm certain my hypothesis, being that all tee ball players know how to fly, will be effectively proven in the coming months.

Trophies Will Save Our Economy

Remember when we were kids and we got trophies for participating in sports? I miss that stuff. I'm really starting to think it's time we brought back that monotonous rewarding system.

I mean, think of it. The economy's down, everybody's bummed, and nobody is getting any free trophies.

Screw Obama's stimulus package plan to help save the economy. You know what Obama? I've got your stimulus package right here.
You know what's a way better idea to save the economy than helping to create proper infrastructure that is able to support and adapt to the global economic imbalances we're seeing today?

Trophies. Yeah, trophies.

If this whole "recession" problem has so much to do with individuals not spending money, then we should give them an incentive to do so. If we had a rewarding system in place for people who go out to stores and buy things, I guarantee you we'd fix this economy by tomorrow by about 5 o'clock (p.m., not a.m. - I'm not THAT crazy).

It wouldn't work, you say, because if everyone got a trophy, there would be no real incentive? Well, I'll show you, I say. Get this: not everybody will get the same sized trophy. Nuh uh.

The size of trophy you will receive will be directly proportional to the size of the "thing" you buy. For instance, the biggest trophies will be designated for people buying vehicles (and up). Smaller trophies will be designated towards things as small as a pack of spaghetti. We will certainly have pocket-sized trophies for minuscule objects.


So anyway, yeah. That's my plan to save the economy. Basically, my logic is infallible and you should all bend to my every whim.

Podcast #2

Did another podcast tonight, hope you enjoy.

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN.

Topics covered tonight:

• Banjos and attractiveness in females
• People who don't really play instruments but pretend to
  
• Star Trek, the new movie
• Bubbles
• Pyramids and aliens

Special thanks to Isaac Remer and Weston Thayer.

My First Podcast Ever

Check out my first podcast ever by clicking HERE:

Within this Podcast, recorded at 2 a.m. on Friday night, a few of the following topics were covered:

• Darth Vader's true race?
• Pokeballs: what's going on inside?
• Mogwai: why were there two different genders?

I apologize for the lack of formatting and so forth. This was a first run through and I didn't expect to actually put it online. Next time, there should be slightly more coherency.

Special thanks to guests Adam Holmberg and Isaac Remer.